Setting an Example

Audio By Carbonatix

We all have people who are looking up to us and trying to model their lives and actions after us, to one degree or another. Some of us immediately know that it’s our kids or grandkids who are following our lead. We see them doing things that remind us of ourselves, hear them saying things that we remember saying, and see them choosing hobbies or making fashion choices that are similar (or maybe identical) to the ones that we choose. 

For others, we may be setting an example at our workplace with the way that we do our job or by the way that we conduct ourselves. Maybe we’re setting an example in our neighborhood or friend group by the way that we keep our lawn so pristine or in the way that we treat our wife. Maybe we’re setting an example by being really outgoing and personable—or, conversely, by being reserved and stoic. If you’re not able to be around your family very often, maybe it’s the way that you talk about them and are so proud of what they’re doing with their lives. I don’t know exactly how and when you’re setting an example that other people are aiming to follow, but I am sure that every single one of us is in some way. 

With this knowledge, I want to challenge each of us to be more aware of that fact and intentional about the kind of example that we set. Any dads reading this can obviously see when they’ve unintentionally set an example for their kids when their children repeat a behavior that they actually don’t want them to mimic. We’ve all seen or heard our children saying or doing something they learned directly from us and felt shocked to realize just how much they were paying attention to something that we didn’t realize was so significant. 

So, dads and grandpas, that means we need to work extra hard to make sure that we’re living up to the standards that we’re setting for our kids and grandkids. This means we need to watch the words that we say and the way that we talk about other people. It means we need to be careful that we’re not reacting out of anger; rather, we need to take the time to be intentional about our responses, even when we’re angry. It means we need to be honest, hardworking, reliable, and a whole list of other things that we’re trying to teach our kids and grandkids to value. We also need to apologize when we are wrong.

The way we handle the ups and downs of life will be the way that we’re “training” the kids in our lives to handle those moments. That’s why it is so important that we choose to do the right thing rather than the thing that feels good or easy. While these things are absolutely vital when we’re setting an example for the kids in our lives, they’re also important in the moments when our example is for our fellow adults. No matter who is watching, it’s important that we’re making choices that we would be proud to see other people imitating. We won’t do it perfectly, but just by remembering that we’re constantly offering up an example that others are watching and following, it will make a difference in the way that we think, act, and speak. This will help us all to win more often at home.